We all ask ourselves questions. Am I a good parent? Should I be doing more to help others? Should I be reconnecting with family and friends I’ve lost touch with? Should I be spending more time with the children? Am I enough?
Enough is one of those funny words, like ‘lots’ or ‘sufficient’. We know what it means and how to use it, but we can’t measure it, can’t quantify it. So how then does one know if they have enough, done enough or are doing enough? Falling over drunk or your button popping on your jeans after dinner is a safe way of knowing you’ve had enough, but when it comes to the pressures of parenting, to constantly be smiling and to look good 24/7, it is then we question ourselves and evaluate ourselves as an individual.
Because of the way the world works these days with everything being so fast, technology overload and social media portraying the perfect life, maybe we’ve just forgotten what enough feels like. Maybe we now set our sights too high, the bar keeps rising, the finish line gets further away so nothing is ever finished, nothing ever feels fulfilled therefore we continue to search for that consideration, that judgement, that label that tells us that we are complete, that we are enough. Although if, as we say, ‘enough’ is immeasurable, then how do we ever know if or when we’ve arrived?
But what if we were to look at this a different way. Let’s not hide it, we all have crappy days, we all get frustrated and annoyed, cheesed off and miserable, life is hard. We don’t all wear tights and capes and have amazing life-altering superpowers, but what we do have is work, kids, chores and chaos that reminds us every day that we’re human.
All anyone is guaranteed is this moment, so take away all the materialistic stuff, take away the need to paint the picture of perfection to the outside world and look at yourself as you are right now, right in this moment as you read this page. You’re in your comfy jeans, your hair is a mess, the sink is full of dishes, or maybe you’re at your desk scouring the internet when you should be working.
But you don’t have to do more or be more, you are who you are. Ok, you may not be the perfect final version of yourself, we will all continue to learn to improve our being and we all strive to be better, but you must be truthful to yourself and remember the best gift is the present tense so accept the person you are right here, right now and know that you are enough.
Knowing you’re enough doesn’t mean you don’t need help from anyone, it doesn’t mean you are completely self-sufficient and can do it all alone in this big wide world, but it does mean you can give yourself a break and not hide your true self by pretending to be something you’re not. We all make mistakes, we all have our faults and our flaws, but it doesn’t mean as a person we aren’t enough, they make us who we are.
Being enough is being content, being comfortable in your own skin, being grateful for what you have. When you’re in a relationship that you feel safe in, when you’re passionate about your work, when you and your kids are happy and healthy, when you’re making the most of your time, when you sleep well and wake up happy, when your stable and smiling in life, all of this makes you enough.
There’s not a one-size-fits-all solution to what each of us may be going through in life, we are all so different and we all have a choice to make. We can continue to push for more always feeling like we’re not adequate, or we can accept our circumstances, embrace life and live it.
Granted there’s never enough time or love in this world but showing up every day, being there and providing for those that need it, that’s all you have to do. Life is short, and each of us only gets one roll of the dice so choose to believe in yourself and don’t beat yourself up… you’ve got this.